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Sometimes I just want to stay home on the couch, or go back to bed. I feel like everything is gray.

Part of it is the weather. It’s been super cold where I am. Of course I want to stay home with my kitty cat, a cup of cocoa, and a pile of blankets! This impulse is clearly an evolution-favored trait.

Also, being back in the ordinary status quo life of working for the man has been deeply unsatisfying. I’m tired a lot, and I feel uninspired and numb. I think there must be more to life than this, but then I think, “is there?”

What to do? I hate feeling this way, so I spent the afternoon scouring the internet for solutions. Surprisingly, it was not a waste of time. Although a lot of the advice was stuff I’ve heard a million times before, apparently it was what I needed to hear, because I started feeling better. Why is it that even when I know the answers, I have to be told again?

Here’s what I found.

Check the source of tension

If you have a chemical imbalance in your brain, definitely get professional help and drugs to sort that out. Barring that, is there something in your life that isn’t working for you? If there is, you need to figure out how to change it. This may mean eliminating the situation, reworking it to fit your needs better, or changing the way you view it. But if you just have the blues, here are some things that can help.

Lose the blues

• Go for a walk. There’s a reason you see this advice so often—it works! To get maximum impact, do it outside where you can look at some trees or other nature, and do it during daylight. The little bit of exercise you get will fire off some happy chemicals in your brain,¹ immersing yourself in nature is restorative to an extent that just walking is not,² and even on a cloudy day, exercising outside helps with seasonal affective disorder.³ Also, you’re taking care of yourself, which helps you feel loved and valued, and letting your mind wander as you walk can help you figure out what’s bothering you and what to do about it. It’s a multi-dimensional win.
• Listen to music. Put on some of your favorite tunes—something peppy or something that takes you back to a great time in your life. This is often enough to lift a mild case of the blues. If you’re feeling intensely down, it may help to take the opposite approach: start with sad songs and gradually ramp up to happier stuff. Or, get the most melodramatic woe songs you can find and wail along. I find “All by myself” by Eric Carmen a great choice for this. It’s so damn depressing, I can never take it, or myself, seriously. After a 3-minute wallow with that song, I’m ready to move on.
• Seek people or solitude. Which one you need depends on your personality and circumstances. If you’re feeling overwhelmed, overscheduled, smothered, frazzled, or unable to think, try solitude. On the other hand, if you’re feeling empty, lonely, bored, dull, or lifeless, try spending time with friends. Both are important for everybody. Extroverts get their energy from other people. Introverts recharge by being alone, but we can still get a big boost from spending time with others in stimulating conversation and laughter.

  

• Laugh. It’s good for you! I try to keep my life sprinkled with daily sources of humor, including the comics, Failbook, and Cakewrecks. I also enjoy telling exaggerated stories with ridiculous spins to make others laugh. When something crappy happens, making it into a crazy story is one of my favorite strategies, because once my listener laughs, I usually start laughing, too.
• Look for the positive. Remember the 3:1 positivity ratio for thriving. I’ve been so far from this the past few weeks! Seek out and notice the good things and silver linings.
• Take care of yourself. If you don’t eat enough veggies or get enough sleep, you’re setting yourself up. It’s very hard to feel good when you’re sleep deprived or not getting proper nutrition. If you’re sleeping enough and but feeling super draggy, something that often helps me is to make pasta with beef, tons of spinach, tomatoes, and red bell peppers. Give me iron!
• Do something different. Often when I’m feeling down, it’s because I’m stuck in a rut or getting too serious and not taking enough time off. It starts to seem like there’s nothing in life but work. Even work you enjoy will get old after a while! Give yourself a break and do something else. If you’re running yourself ragged, take the evening off and read a non-serious book. If you’re listless and unsatisfied, pick an activity that you enjoy that requires concentration, challenges you, and is a good match for your skills. Those are the activities that yield maximal satisfaction.

Here’s to beating the blues! If anyone has any other suggestions, please share in the comments!

Related posts:
How unhappiness works–and how to beat it
The number one shortcut to enjoying life more
The #2 shortcut to enjoying life

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¹Mayo Clinic. “Depression and anxiety: Exercise eases symptoms.” http://www.mayoclinic.com/health/depression-and-exercise/MH00043

² Marc G. Berman,1,2 John Jonides,1 and Stephen Kaplan. “The Cognitive Benefits of Interacting With Nature.” Psychological Science, vol. 19 (2008), no. 12, pp. 1207-1212.

³John M. Grohol. “Treatment for Seasonal Affective Disorder.” Psych Central, November 2004. http://psychcentral.com/library/seasonal_affective_treatment.htm